October 11, 2006

29 Phobias Associated with the 10 Highest Grossing Films of October 6–October 8, 2006

As moviemaking technology gets more and more sophisticated, filmmakers are better able to create works that can scare viewers out of their seats. I provide the following list as a warning to those of you who may have specific fears likely to be triggered by these current blockbusters. I recommend that you find an alternate movie, unless you have Theatrophobia (fear of theaters) to begin with.

  1. The Departed
    • Hoplophobia: Fear of firearms
    • Ballistophobia: Fear of bullets
    • Murophobia: Fear of rats
  2. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre—The Beginning
    • Mechanophobia: Fear of machines (like chainsaws)
    • Hemophobia: Fear of blood
    • Necrophobia: Fear of death or dead things
  3. Open Season
    • Hylophobia: Fear of forests
    • Agrizoophobia: Fear of wild animals
    • Arctophobia, Ursaphobia: Fear of bears (Are you listening, Stephen Colbert?)
  4. Employee of the Month
  5. The Guardian
    • Thalassophobia: Fear of the sea
    • Cymophobia: Fear of waves
    • Aquaphobia, Hydrophobia: Fear of water
    • Floppaphobia: Fear of Waterworld
  6. Jackass: Number Two
    • Dystychiphobia: Fear of accidents
    • Traumatophobia: Fear of injury
  7. School for Scoundrels
    • Scolionophobia, Didaskaleinophobia: Fear of school
    • Sophophobia: Fear of learning
    • Testophobia: Fear of taking tests
    • Slingbladaphobia: Fear of Billy Bob Thornton (who has Coulrophobia, the fear of clowns)
  8. Jet Li’s Fearless
    • Nihilophobia: Fear of (absolutely) nothing
    • Peladophobia: Fear of bald people
    • Sinophobia: Fear of the Chinese, Chinese culture, etc.
    • Consecotaleophobia: Fear of chopsticks
  9. Gridiron Gang
  10. The Illusionist
    • Rhabdophobia, Arcanophobia: Fear of magic
    • Pogonophobia, Pognophobia: Fear of beards (especially Edward Norton’s goatee)

Update: This post was featured in the October 13, 2006 edition of the Carnival of Cinema.

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